Sunday 30 January 2011

Day 21 – Elemental Politics

From the diary of Vida Pankhurst

Together we scowl
together we play the dark
upon the land and sky and mind
So I woke up to take my watch and things seemed fine, both internally and externally, until some bloody big fungus blob like thing percolated out of the darkness and  engulfed both Ugg and Fillian whilst they slept. I woke Sameson, knowing him to be the expert on weird plants. He called upon Obad-hai to turn the creature, which finally released the two and slid off back into the crypt. As a consequence of the attack not all of us were fully recuperated!

Joe it seemed had pricked his finger upon a poisoned needle during the previous day so Sameson cured him of this malady. I think Sameson must have had some kind of kicker in his breakfast that morning because he seemed even more pro-active than usual, and he decided to use his powers to speak to the dead earth temple priests in the crypt. He questioned them about the best way to circumvent the earth elemental that blocks our path and they told him of an earth temple robe that stops the earthy guardians from attacking. The dead priests told him that it was in the possession of Rommag the leader of the temple and gave us sketchy directions on which way to go to collect it. Well…at least this is what Sameson told us, but for all I know he could be making it all bloody up and he just has some kind of morbid fascination with talking to corpses; who knows how these acorn lovers get their kicks.

So off we went and found a secret door from the deceased priest’s instructions. We found a narrow passageway behind it so we stepped back and allowed Joe to do his sneaky thing. Bloody net-maker my beard. Anyone he skulked down there to look behind a curtain with Fillian and then Joe gestured me to come forward, so I bloody came forward and he had the bloody audacity to rebuke me for making noise. I would like to see him try bloody sneaky sneaky about in full chainmail armour! Besides it was the lumbering Ugg that was making all the noise, but obviously it is always the woman’s fault in their narrow little human brains.

So we obviously alerted a magic user inside the room behind the curtain who threw a sonic blast at us that knocked Fillian’s wand and rapier right out of his hands. Joe pulled the stunned elf to safety, and Ugg and I marched in to the room to get the bugger who turned out to be Rommag himself (the earth temple cleric in charge).  He began yelling for his men; pfft always bloody men, whilst Ugg and I advanced on him. Then he lobbed a sonic boom at us again. Ugg was knocked senseless but I shook it off. I’m a bloody dwarf after all, magic barely touches me. I conjured my goddess’ holy weapon and set it about knocking chunks out of the cleric, before attacking him with my own war hammer.

At this point another bloody cleric entered the fray from a side chamber. Joe, Fillian and Sameson attacked him, but he retreated back behind his curtain. Ugg recovered from the sonic blast and with Sameson and Fillian pursued the cleric. Joe tried to circle behind Rommag to place a dagger between his ribs, but the clever bastard backed up against a wall. So Joe and I went head to head with the head of the earth temple. He was a strong git, attacking us with his mighty mace and magic. From the side chamber I could hear Fillian conjuring magic and the calls of many men, the soldiers of the earth temple, dying. They had ran into the soldiers of the earth temple, but I knew there was nothing we could do to aid them because, along with Joe, I was locked in a deadly battle of my own with Rommag.

Just when we were kicked his earthy butt he evocated a powerful darkness and slipped away. But be damned if I would let another evil cleric slip out of my grasp so I decided to plunge into the darkness and hope for the best. Joramy be blessed I found a wall and felt my way along it till I found a curtain leading to another smaller room. I stepped out of the darkness and saw Joe grappling with Rommag on the floor. Bloody barbaric men! Rommag cast Joe aside and climbed to his feet, but the room was not lit and he stumbled blindly around. Natural darkness, of course, is no problem for us dwarves and so I seized the advantage. I called a warning to Joe who leapt to the floor just in time as I cast my goddess’s mighty flames at Rommag. Near to death and knowing himself alone, and outclassed, Rommag prudently surrendered.

He agreed to help us defeat the water temple. So Joe and I marched him back into the bigger room and found the others had dispatched of the soldiers and got the other cleric, the 2nd in command called Harstch, to surrender too. The two bloody fools started arguing with each other about whether they wanted us to destroy the water or air temple. Eventually, we decided the water temple was the biggest threat so we would put them down. I bloody hate water anyway.

Rommag told us their leader is a man called Balsonic (whose name I’ve heard before I’m sure). The clerics then gave us some directions on how to enter their temple. Whilst we were having this conversation Joe bloody well decided to try to loot some treasure from Rommag’s chamber and ended up pricking himself on another poison needle. Bloody thieves never learn!

In the end we just took the key to the chest off Rommag and looted some dosh, potions and scrolls.

After much heated debate (I do love heated debate!!) we set off to find the water temple but ended up stumbling upon a part of the air temple instead. Some bugbears had set up a barricade, so we bashed it down and cut them to pieces. Further on we encountered an air temple cleric with gnolls in her service. She hurled some spells at us like the last lot, but was no match for our combined might. She cast a silence spell on a coin and threw it at Fillian. Nimble bastard managed to catch it and throw it back at her; consequently, she was powerless to use her own magic. That’ll bloody teach her to try and be clever with her evil powers. Then she surrendered! What is it with everyone bloody surrendering today?! Turns out she was Kellno, the leader of the air temple!

So we tried to convince her we wanted to join the air temple, but she wasn’t having any of it till we gave her proof. She did give us the useful information that the fire temple had offered her an alliance against the water temple. Most interesting! Anyway we left her promising to return with proof we wished to ally with her. We went round the area until we reached the Great Corridor again and this time we found a secret door near the east. As we opened it mist brewed out and we discovered we were back at the bloody water temple again.
This time, as I seemed to be getting used to the eerie being underwater affect, I took the time to take in the huge hall with its many buttresses and arches. Some magic had evidently been placed here because  the walls, that are covered in slabs of blue azurite-malachite, give out a soft cloudy greenish luminosity that seemed to seep from the very walls and floor making the whole chamber appear as if deep underwater.
Even the damp air seemed to smell of the bloody sea.  Besides the altar and fountain (which Sameson tried to raid a few days ago) there is an alcove ten feet deep in the back wall of which is covered by a drapery apparently fashioned from seaweed and water! Thank Joramy that the bloody behemoth Juggernaut thing wasn’t activated anymore. It was back standing behind the fountain blocking the alcove which must be the entrance to where the water temple leader resides.  This time I noticed that each corner of the hall was filled by a triangular plinth. Atop each of these columns was a gargoyle-like statue made of bronze and coated with verdigris.
So Joe tried to sneak through this room but to no one’s real surprise the gargoyles came alive and swooped down to attack us. Ugg, Sameson and I leapt forward to do battle with the ugly monsters, whilst Fillian looked through his spell book for something to fling at them from the corridor. The things hampered from the sky for a bit before landing and attempting to claw us into bite size chunks. I remember hearing Fillian’s new toy (his magic missile wand) banging away whilst I smashed one of them into rubble with my trusty war hammer, which I had blessed with the might of the raging volcano.
They were tough little bastards though and smelt worse than Ugg’s pits. “They’re undead,” I heard Sameson cry from near me. Bloody great, I thought and the two of us drove them off with our holy symbols held high. We made haste through the hall and decided to try one of the other doors in there. Inside was a magically enchanted corridor that once stepped inside felt like you had been plunged bloody miles underwater. Before we could drown we quickly stepped back into the water temple hall, but right back into the clutches of the gargoyles.
Infuriated by this point we fought with increased fervour and hacked the flying beasties into nothingness. On one of the corpses we discovered a cloak. Sameson, with his characteristic disregard for caution, put it on and turned into a bloody gargoyle himself. Frankly I thought it was an improvement to him! Quickly he took it off but decided to keep it; so he could spend his days off perched on some pillar leering down on a temple full of vestal virgins I don’t doubt.
Anyhow, we decided to try our look squeezing past the Juggernaut to the alcove behind, but it activated again and rolled towards us menacingly. We legged it sharpish back to the underwater corridor and took our chance there instead. Being a dwarf and all I managed to hold my breath without difficulty, but my companions with their tiny human/elf lungs struggled. What’s more is they moved at a rock slug’s pace due to the corridor’s enchantment. The phylactery that I pilfered from Lareth made me immune to this effect and so I immensely enjoyed laughing at the men plodding their way through like demented golems. Eventually I took pity on Joe and gave him a water breathing potion to stop him drowning.
On the other side of the corridor once one emerged from the underwater spell you ended up stepping into another spell. This time great gale force winds buffeted us, sending chills right up my…chainmail. Pushing our way through this we emerged with frosted eyebrows out into the corridor which separates the chambers where we fought the hydra and owl bear.
Now we were unsure how to progress. I want to off the water temple leader, since they are the most powerful temple, but that bloody Juggernaut blocks our path to him. The second most powerful temple is beyond our powers to knock down too due to the bloody great hydra blocking the path to its leader. I suggested that perhaps we ally ourselves with the fire temple to bring down the water one. To do this we should join the air temple and convince Kelno to agree to the suggested alliance with the fire temple. Then together we can deal with the Juggernaut and the temple’s leader. Though to join the air temple we should give Kelno proof that we have humbled the earth temple. We could do that by recapturing the earth temple cleric leaders and giving them to Kelno as a good will gesture. After we have all dealt with the water temple we could turn on the other two, who should be weakened by the fight, and then we can march off to the greater temple and throw that down and then presto…no more bloody temple of elemental evil.
Bloody el I think she’s having an influence on me because I seemed to be getting good at this bloody sneaky politics stuff. Of course my plan fell on deaf ears with these bloody men. They ignored me as usual, I’m ‘only a woman’ after all, and they thought it might be more fun to plod off to the greater temple now and do some exploring. Grudgingly I went with them knowing that in a few hours time, after we’ve been beaten about a bit one of them will agree to my idea and bloody claim it was their own.
So we had a quick scuffle with an ooze like creature, which had been devouring the corpse of the owl bear we killed days ago, and then we walked back down the secret passage where she..we had slaughtered the Lamir. Treading carefully through the fungi here we travelled down some more stairs deeper into the black heart of the temple. We entered a room which contained the remnants of food and a piece of torn parchment with a picture of a crowned skull on it. Despite how bloody creepy this is we decided to press on and carried on down some stairs till we reached a crossroads. Ignoring turnings left and right we carried on down some more stairs till we reached a grand corridor with macabre motifs all over the place. Joe, bravely, opted to scout ahead. He returned suggesting we get the hell out of here because in a hall a little way on was two of the biggest trolls he had ever seen and four more gargoyles to boot.
We wisely scarpered back up the stairs and decided to come back here MUCH later. At a higher level of the temple we opted instead to investigate another route from the Lamir’s chamber. We climbed another staircase and emerged into a woodlands area with rocky floorings and cracks where the exit lead to two cave-like holes in the south-east and south-west. Suddenly an ear piercing scream reverberated through the chamber. Must be some damsel in distress, my idiot companions thought and rushed to the cave holes to save whoever had released this cry for help. Only there was no damsel but instead two of the oddest creatures I have ever bloody seen. They had long bodies like the giraffes you see on the plains and the head of what can only be described as some kind of rabid badger!
We retreated from the caves and they pursued us on into the woodlands area, biting at us and kicking out with their long back legs. Finding myself split from the group and summoned a ring of blades to protect me from one of the creatures, who soon found itself a bloodied corpse at my feet. The others dispatched the other creature, but not without substantial injures. We entered their lair and found two skeleton corpses of dwarves who had fallen foul to the monsters. I uttered a prayer to Joramy to take those of my kin to her warm embrace. Most likely they were bloody Morridin worshippers anyway though. Most of the men dwarves are! Still, they did not deserve to die in such a horrid place.
Dead they were though and so they had no need of their weapons, armour or treasure and so we liberated these from them. Finally, a nice set of chainmail that bloody fits me! I also got a new axe and Fillian took a belt with many pouches that contained gems. All of these glowed magical under detection. The last fight had taken its toll on out health and so we decided to rest here for the night.

Saturday 29 January 2011

Day 20 – The Dark Tower

From the diary of Vida Pankhurst

I’m here to stay forever but not today
We stayed in Hommlet for five days. I feel more in control than before. Perhaps it was being away from this bloody horrid place for so long that allows this. I didn’t want to bloody go back, but be damned if I will allow her to make me into a coward before the eyes of mighty Joramy.
I used my time in Hommlet to remake my blessed war hammer, the favoured weapon of my goddess, and prayed to Joramy for guidance in my plight. But she refused to give me any more clues to add to the strange one given before. ‘In 3 on 6 lies 9.’ What the bloody el is that supposed to mean. I’m beginning to worry that the clue didn’t come from her… but from the other one.
Anyway it turns out that the beautiful Mae, and the sailor she left the temple with, never made it back to Hommlet. Joe received a message from the church of the big gamble saying she hadn’t returned and insisting he go look for her. He learnt not to bloody trust that capricious church as well when they scammed him out of all of his money via gambling.
 Concern rife in all of us for Mae’s well-being we set off with our bags full of provisions and made for the temple again. A short journey later and we were soon at the place of ineffable evil once more. As we crossed the courtyard we found a body lying supine. It was the sailor whose body was covered in abrasions and worse yet his bloody eyes had been pulled out! As he chocked in his own blood he gurgled something about a tower.  Sure enough a sinister looking tower lurked in the ruins near the temple which we had yet to explore. Hoping to find Mae inside we uttered prayers of mercy for the poor sailor and headed in the direction of the tower’s drawbridge.
We hadn’t got far when the mystery of what happened to the sailor was quickly solved when a swarm of humungous looking crows swarmed from the top window the tower and launched themselves down towards us. Sameson, being mister king of the animals and all, called upon his god and took control of one of them. He made it attack another raven and the two tumbled out of the sky in mortal battle. But that still left about ten more of the things. Suddenly my stomach lurched when I head Fillian garbling in the language of magic. ‘What bloody elf trick was he conjuring this time!?,’ I thought. He threw a fireball from his hands and then the air was a cloud of feathers and barbequed raven. I gotta admit that elf has bloody style sometimes.
We crossed the bridge and discovered the door to the tower was locked. Luckily we have old fleet fingers Joe with us and he deftly picked the lock. Pulling open the door revealed darkness within. With my keen dwarf eyes I managed to make out lots of humanoid figures within who punctually assailed us with arrows before I could shout a warning to my friends.
We charged in and discovered the place to be full of soldiers faithful to the temple. On the ground floor of the tower we were engaged by some warriors, whilst archers peppered us with their bows from a staircase above. Fillian cast his trademark Web spell to take some of the warriors out the battle as they became entangled in his magical net. I called down the fiery powers of my goddess upon others, as Sameson and Ugg fought with some of the commanders. Joe snuck around making use of his own crossbow and short sword within the wild confines of this epic battle. And that was the last thing I remember because the battle rage took over me and the next thing I knew I was on the staircase hacking down archers with my war hammer. I turned to find we had dispatched all but one of the soldiers, who we opted to take captive.
It seemed the lieutenant who had been barking orders in the battle had fled through one of the side doors on the bottom floor of the tower. Thinking him trapped we interrogated the surviving soldier who admitted to being a simple mercenary under pay from the temple. The only other useful thing he knew was that Mae was brought to the temple. Letting him go we pursued the lieutenant. But we were too late! He had escaped through a trapdoor. We raided a chest in the chamber that contained lots of treasure, including a topaz incrusted short sword and magical cloak. Also in the chest was a list of potential kidnap victims for the temple. We took this to show to Burnes. I think we should bloody take it to show the potential victims so we could finally get some gratitude from the locals!
We piled the bodies up and left a warning so that any other recruits know what becomes of those who ally themselves with the temple. Then we followed the passageway down the trapdoor and discovered it led almost all the way back to Hommlet, exiting at a dry well within view of the village. So this is how the new recruits for the temple are coming in! The bloody lieutenant was long gone by now though, so we returned via the passage to the temple and decided to explore the other ruined towers on the outskirts of the temple courtyard.
Most of these turned out to be empty but whilst exploring became possessed by a strange creature called a Cranium rat. It looked like any other rat except it had glowing red eyes and a large brain protruding from its skull, all out in the open to see. It looked bloody disgusting if you ask me. Still it doesn’t surprise me that even a rat has a bigger brain than these men. The creature took control of most of the men. It tried with me but I shook its influence off. I was ready to squish the bugger and the rest of its kin, but it seemed they meant us no harm. In fact they gave us some useful information about Mae. The rats claimed that she is some sort of ‘favoured of the souls’ and that’s why the temple want her. They said she is ‘safe within the darkness.’ Whatever that bloody well means.

Things got even more blummin weird when they stole some of Fillian’s spells right out of his head and Little Bit (Fillian’s rat that stole my last copper pieces in Nulb – I’ll get the bugger for that one day) opted to become their leader and stay with them. Anyway, they released the men from their wacky mind control and
after this most odd encounter we turned and entered the main temple once more to search for Mae.
Having a million and one bloody questions between us we decided to head back to the augury chamber to see if it might be able to answer our questions about what my clue meant, or where Mae or whoever this Keller person is that Sameson keeps harping on about. Of course this meant going through the chamber with the striges again. The nasty bugs attacked us but this time we were ready for the things and swatted them down with ease.
In the chamber we asked our questions and got nothing but what seemed like random, and bloody obvious, advice. Stuff like ‘beware the cursed corridor’ or ‘go to the blessed door’. I felt like burning the whole bloody place down to be honest, but instead we decided to go down a nearby corridor we had yet to explore. We discovered a new area behind some wall hangings and entered a room with rich soil on the floor rather that your usual sturdy stone. At the far side of the room we could see a large altar upon a pyramid like pedestal with stairs leading up to it. It didn’t take a wizard to realize this was part of the earth temple.
We stepped onto the soil and then a humungous earth elemental pulled itself out the ground before us. It took one swipe with its big earthy fists at Joe and sent him flying back down the corridor. Ugg tried to hold it off but it did the same to him. We hitched up our armour and legged it, healing the fallen as we passed them. The animated lump of earth followed us for a while but ceased its pursuit when we were far away from the earth temple entrance. Just to be safe though we have sealed ourselves into the crypts which we slept in a few days ago. Here we will rest to regain our strength and think on how to proceed without getting turned into bloody jam.

Days 15 to 19 – Stay in Hommlet

Days 15 to 19 – Stay in Hommlet

No entry found

Tuesday 25 January 2011

Day 14 –The search for Elves

From the diary of Vida Pankhurst

And I was in the darkness, so darkness I became…
Today Fillian seemed especially irate over his missing elf friends and so pulled out a scroll of finding that he had been saving. He used this and ascertained that his mistress is being held back where the water temple was. We decided to head back that way, near where we killed the Owlbear a few days ago. On the way we entered a room that had been trashed and left derelict long ago. However, we failed to see a horde of horrible bug creatures with protruding beaks by the ceiling that swarmed us and attempted to suck the blood from our warm bodies. Fillian and I both managed to knock a few out with sleep spells but they kept coming faster than even Ugg could crush them.
Retreating out of the room we found the way back up to the main chamber and we followed Fillian back to where we killed the owlbear. To make matters more complicated for the poor wizard he detected his mistress was being moved; most likely for sacrifice. As we approached the general area he sensed she was now being moved near the fire temple (which is guarded by that hyrda creature that is beyond our current abilities to defeat). Consequently, we decided to investigate a secret door we discovered on route instead. It opened to reveal a seemingly unused stairway leading down into a dark chamber infested with fungi and mushrooms of all descriptions.
Joe and Sameson exhibited their usual bravado and opted to explore down the stairs first. Of course, it was not long till the sound of trouble brewing was heard by the rest of us at the top of the stairs. I followed them down into the chaos to see Joe trying to restrain Sameson, who he was convinced had gone insane. Looking across the room I saw the true cause of any insanity. To those ungifted with the ability to see through such a deception was an old, rather harmless looking, lady. I saw a creature with the head and upper body of a woman but the lower body of a lion. A Lamia!
The creature tried her tricks on us but to no avail and Fillian hurled fire at the beast woman. Seeing that the creature was relatively unscathed by this attack I cast wrack on her. This time she failed to resist and the creature writhed and screeched in agony as the pain overwhelmed her. My companions then finished the pitiful creature before she could do any more harm to us and the spell on Joe ceased to be.
At this point my companions decided this was perhaps not the best route for us to proceed in and we backtracked a little. This most blessed and cursed temple is confusing to us, and I must confess to being thoroughly lost in what lies where. Fillian however seemed to know exactly the way to go to rescue his beloved elven mistress and so we followed him on a different route. We encountered another group of bugbears, which we routinely slaughtered. Relieving them of any useful items we proceeded on through a concealed door into to a huge ornate chamber decorated with a plethora of carvings and sculptures resembling sea creatures. In its centre stood a huge fountain. Behind the fountain stood a mighty construction... Even these fools that stagger blindly within the darkness of this mighty temple gleaned that this must be the entrance to the water temple.
Sameson decided to investigate the fountain and I accompanied him; mostly because I find it amusing to jog his memory of what happened last time this body and his stood alone together before an altar to a dark god. Within the murky depths of the fountain shiny, precious items glowed. Powerless to resist their appeal, Sameson reached into the fountain and took one of the items. Immediately the construct behind the fountain began to move and lumber towards us. This was no mere statue, but a powerful golem known as a juggernaut. We did the only logical thing to do against such an apparition and fled the chamber; Sameson promptly dropping the item back into the fountain.
Moving expediently down the corridor we put as much distance as possible between ourselves and the juggernaut. We only stopped when we were sure the golem pursued us no longer. Wondering what to do next we took a different door from the bugbear chamber and encountered an ogre in an adjacent room. The creature seemed too lazy to attack us and devoid of the usual belligerence of its race. It simply shouted at us to go away and let it sleep. My companions agreed with me that this would be an ideal subject to torture and use to gain information about the temple. Besting it in combat (although one gets the impression the ogre was so lazy that it barely even tried to win) we bound the ogre and I set about tormenting the beast.
In the room we found a teddy bear that the ogre clearly had a mawkish attachment too. I broke the ogre by making him watch me cut his beloved toy to pieces. He told us through his blubbering that the prisoners we sought were to be found nearby and we used him as a guide to show us exactly where.  It led us north and up a stairwell and we found another exit ending in a corridor. The ogre continued to lead us through a pair of crossroads and into a large room in which a statue of a large bull headed humanoid sat upon a throne.
Being understandable dubious about such statues we forced the ogre to go in first. Our caution paid well because the bull-headed creature was not a statue at all but a minotaur that promptly stood and charged the ogre; it ripped the ogre’s guts out with it’s a horns and then hurled the carcass aside, like the ogre was no more than a teddy bear itself.
Ugg and Sameson charged and despite taking heavy wounds from the beast’s great axe succeeded in killing it. Whilst my companions licked their wounds I tried to make use of the creature’s soul, but it resisted and was whisked off to whatever bestial god minotaurs pay homage to. 
Forced to progress without the ogre we travelled on through an assortment of strange empty rooms. One clearly an armoury of some sort, another with water trickling down its walls and finally a massive hall littered with skeletons that seemed to have hosted one off the bigger battles when the temple was torn down years ago. Finally we reached our desired destination by following the ogre’s directions. Knowing the cell to be close we debated about the best course of action. The ogre had told us, under duress, that an ogre guarded the prisoners.
Joe decided to disguise himself in water temple robes and claim that he was here to bring the elf missionary for her execution whilst the rest of us waited in the corridor. This plan worked and she was turned over to him alive, if malnourished. Joe reported that another elf prisoner was also held inside guarded by the ogre and a bugbear jailer but this one, a man, was a prisoner of the fire temple. As such they would not believe that Joe was of both temples and so I donned the fire temple robes and said I would try to free the elf. Of course they believed me and turned him over to me unconscious. I must confess at the sight of the helpless creature I was tempted to rid the world of another sanctimonious elf; however I feel my companions would have taken umbrage at this, so I stayed my hand.
We took the elves to the temple entrance and the male one, whose name was Cambient or something equally as poncy, took the feather from Samson’s hair and used it to call griffins to bear him and the other elf off to freedom, without so much as a thank you. So typical of elves to make such an ostentatious show of their powers. Anyway, as exhausted as we were we decided to journey back to Hommlet to gather supplies and so I write this on our way back and ready to undertake my usual night time struggle.

Day 13 – Harpies and Sweet Revenge

From the diary of Vida Pankhurst

Earth, air, fire and water. The elder eye blinds them all, as they dance to the sound of their own slaughter.
I awoke feeling more myself today than I have since entering this place. My companions gathered around and set about finding a route that we have yet to traverse in the temple. I let them guide me to a new area down a series of corridors near where they freed the slaves. There we entered a large chamber with two large columns at the far side of it. As we entered a barrier slammed down behind us trapping us in the room. Before I could react to this trap I heard the most beautiful music filling my ears.
Joe and I felt ourselves powerless to resist the music’s pull which lured us into the room towards the columns. On top of these were what appeared to be winged women with large talons, which I now know to be the creatures known as harpies. It was their song that kept us so enraptured.
I remember nothing from that point other than floating upon the blissful melody of the siren’s song. Sweet and enchanting it held us in its sway. Unbeknownst to me some foolish servants of Iuz attacked my companions whilst I was in a trance. Thank the great one they were no match for Fillian’s magic. I came around to discover piles of undead bodies, including a Wight that had a strange medallion around its neck. My companions had also managed to slay one of the harpies and the other had retreated from the chamber thus ending her song and our trance.
The next thing my companions did was to destroy the amulet. Apparently it had blocked Sameson’s ability to turn the creatures. Interesting, I wonder how this undead servant of Iuz came to possess such a device.
We took what treasure we could from the chamber and followed the trail of bloody feathers left by the dying harpy. Our pursuit was delayed by ghouls and the nastier ghasts, which we hacked to pieces as quickly as possible. Joe spotted a secret door that we opened and followed a passageway inside north. Fillian released we were going to enter a chamber that we could double round to. Therefore, we opted to split up and surprise whatever was inside.
I ended up lumped with the elf and thief on my side, whilst Sameson and Ugg looped round. Anyway, we entered another large room with three figures inside surrounding the dying harpy we had been chasing. Imagine our surprise to see that whore Mae dressed in air temple robes with a rather lithe looking woman and the temple spy Grommag who we encountered in Hommlet. The surprise at seeing Mae with these air temple flunkies was enough to ruin our sneak attack. The lithe looking woman broke the harpy’s neck and Mae transformed before our eyes into the familiar face of Neddy.
Finally a chance to inflict some pain on something mortal. Especially these failures. Frustratingly, Neddy managed to shrug off my first attempt to break him with a Wrack spell. Ugg lept forward to fight Grommag whilst the lithe woman, a monk, threw a shiruken at Fillian and Sameson. They found themselves unable to speak since the weapon seemed to be enchanted with a silence spell. Ugg dispatched Grommag quickly but, whilst I was distracted by the monk leaping to attack me, Neddy cast a charm spell on him forcing Ugg to attack an advancing Sameson.
Joe confronted and killed the monk bitch with a point blank shot into her neck leaving me free to summon the power of my mighty deity to put Ugg into deep slumber. I caught Joe in the same spell which left just Sameson, Fillian and I conscious to advance on Neddy. The cornered rat tried every trick in his spell book to stop me taking my revenge upon him. I shook off most of these attempts but he got lucky and blinded me with a glitterdust spell. His luck was out though when Sameson removed its effects and I sliced him to pieces with my axe. Of course death is too pleasant an option for one such as him so whilst Sameson was busy waking the others, and Fillian absorbing the secrets of Neddy’s spell book, I made sure Neddy’s soul was put to good use and I left the battle feeling empowered.
I must confess I did enjoy Fillian’s confusion at the powers I exhibited in this battle. How typical of an elf to be under the mistaken impression that they possess all of the magical power in Greyhawk.
Healing ourselves from the battle we continued to explore the area and found a strange circular shaped room to the north which glowed with an inexplicable light. I recognized it as an augury chamber. My companions decided to all make use of this most eldritch chamber and I, of course, followed suit. The predictions, or rather warning, it gave me was ‘beware cursed artefact’. A statement that I feel states the ‘bloody’ obvious. My companions had similar warnings and advice given to them of what to beware or go to. Nonsense it may be, depending on what power made the chamber and for what purpose. Time will tell.
Heading north we passed an altar that I warned the others not to touch. They wisely heeded my warning. Further north was a door enchanted with a magical cold trap. Joe disabled this and we entered into a crypt owned by the earth temple. Being who they are, my companions wasted no time in defiling the crypts and taking the treasure inside. Including an enhanced cloak and ring that Sameson and Joe took respectively. Much to my censure the party also decided to rest here. These men have no stamina. Do they not realize the clock is ticking and I may not command powers tomorrow that I have today?! Unfortunately I was outvoted I had no choice but to rest as they suggested. Let us see if tomorrow favours me.

Sunday 23 January 2011

Day 12 – The Earth Temple

From the diary of Vida Pankhurst

Stone to flesh and flesh to stone. Decaying flesh beats cracking bone.
Entering through our special window again we decided to explore down a different set of passageways. We found a locked door which Joe picked and inside we found prisoners taken from Nulb. And thank mighty Joramy Mae, Joe’s sister, was inside safe and unscathed. How the bloody hell she managed to stay looking so beautiful in her state of duress is simply astonishing. Anyway… we freed them and showed them the way out. They told us they were due to be sacrifices for the Earth section of the Temple. Also some man who claimed to be a sailor offered to join us, but that last bloody thing we need is another man getting in the way so we sent him packing.
We opened another door nearby to reveal a horde of foul ghouls who attacked us on sight. Between us we made short work of the disgusting creatures mostly thanks to mine and Samson’s divine powers. More of the beast were found in adjacent rooms though and as we battled our way through them larger more powerful undead, known as Ghasts, entered the fray. We smited them with weapons and holy fire and, even though their foul claws succeeded in paralyzing Joe, they fell before our combined might.
Retracing our steps revealed much treasure and a pair of Mae’s underwear, which is a treasure in itself! Those salacious men tried to take them of course, but I confiscated them for safe keeping. For the sake of the girl’s own privacy you understand! Pressing on through the chambers we found what must have once been a banquet hall, but now lay in ruins. I found a magically shield around there to add to my growing repertoire of magically items.
Then we found a ruined study to the side of that room. Whilst I investigated a fireplace in there a bloody huge great snake attacked me from inside it. The thing managed to bite me before I could lop its bloody great head off, and I felt its poison creep into my veins within moments. The men continued to look for treasure whilst I emptied my stomach into a corner. ‘O don’t worry about Vida she’s a dwarf. She can take it.’
I managed to shake it off a little; albeit feeling a bit weakened and we doubled back to investigate another corridor we passed. We found a door at the end and opened to reveal a small bloody army of humans loyal to the earth temple. They trigged a trap in the corridor and Fillian plummeted into a pit which began to fill with oil. Then they began pelting us with arrows. Ugg and I slammed the door shut after taking substantial damage whilst Joe and Sameson pulled Fillian to safety using Ugg’s rope.
They pulled him out just in time to meet another group of earth temple devotees that exploded out of a secret door behind us, also armed with bows and arrows. Ugg and I released the door and charged the men behind us whilst Fillian cast a web spell to entangle all the men in the room in front of us. I’ve never had so many bloody arrows in me at one time! Fillian then turned and cast a sleep spell on the men behind us and I did what was necessary again and ensured they would never awaken, whilst Ugg, Sameson and Joe dispatched the ones still awake.
Then the oil filled pit Fillian had been in seconds before started to bellow fire so we entered the secret door and circled round to another entrance to the room with the entangled men inside. Knowing they would break free soon we set fire to the web from outside and let them burn within the wrath of my mighty goddess. And so ended our first strike against the earth temple!
Feeling rather pleased with ourselves we looted the treasure found amongst the charred corpses of the earth temple devotees and continued to explore the area. After some exploration we came across a huge chamber littered with bones. Obviously some big battle happened here when the temple was first razed.  Picking our way through the room it came as no bloody surprise when some of the skeletons animated and attacked us. Sameson and I annihilated most of them with a wave of our holy symbols whilst Ugg smashed the remaining undead back into piles of bones.
Hoping to find some valuable antiques amongst the bones I cast detect magic but was rudely interrupted by two bloody big ogres charging into the room. These ogres were frothing at the mouth under some kind of rage and one of them knocked Fillian cold out with one blow. Ugg and Sameson took on one each but the raging ogres quickly began to take chunks out of them. Joe at this point seemed to be having a dance off with the last remaining skeleton from before, so it was up to me to heal Ugg and Sameson before the ogres made them into bloody mince meat.
Finally Ugg bested the ogres and I set about healing everyone before we carried on. In a side chamber we found a chest and a load of money inside. Unfortunately we didn’t get to keep it long because Sameson, like a fool, charged into a side room and was taken hostage by another ogre and a small horde (or should that be a pack!?) of gnolls. They agree to let him go if we turned over all our money and left through a secret door in the bone chamber. I felt like letting the bloody acorn worshipper pay for his stupidity but in the end we agreed to their terms and went back to the secret door.
On the other side of the door was a thin ledge going up and down a massive pit which we seemed to be about halfway down. Learning from our earlier encounter with the bloody hydra we opted to go up the ledge, or at least that’s what we tried to do but Joe fell off whilst trying to scramble up the ledge at the top of the pit and started to fall down. Luckily he had that flaming feather fall ring on so he glided down rather than plummeted to his death. Sameson tried to grab him as he floated down but ended up falling as well.
The rest of us had no choice but to shimmy down the bloody ledge as they glided down to the gods know what. Luckily we found them both unscathed in a huge chamber with some sort of sacrificial bowl in the centre. The ledge ended about twenty feet from the floor of the chamber, but we managed to pull up out of the incense scented room before anything inimical happened to them down there. It’s a blasted miracle that the two of them managed to curb their usual male propensity to poke around and incite trouble. I have a feeling that if they had probed around too much down there then we would have been in a whole load of trouble.
Anyone this time we managed to climb back up along the ledge to the top of the pit and clambered out back into the top chamber of the temple of elemental evil by where the air temples altar lies. After much debate we opted to count our blessings and rest for the night. If only I could count on the night of restless sleep my companions can, but she…<page ripped>

Day 11 – The Temple of Elemental Evil

From the diary of Vida Pankhurst

I dream of a nightmare, when dreaming will end.
What a bloody torment….Anak neid froem snallar
We packed our things and joined Pearl to solemnly proceed with the coffin of Otis into the wilds. Only we didn’t get far before a group of what looked like bandits barred our path and demanded money from us. Only, after yesterday’s defeat, I wasn’t in the mood to be trifled with so I rallied the others to fight these bullies off the road. How was I to know that they weren’t bandits but bloody werewolves sent by the temple to attack us.
They transformed into half-wolf half-man hybrids before our eyes. One of them pulled Ugg’s sword right out of himself and the wound healed instantly. My goddess doesn’t hold with that kind of nonsense so I summoned a ring of silver blades around myself and launched myself into the middle of the beasts. It seems that werewolves’ regenerative abilities do not work against silver, so soon my blades were a cloud of shredded guts and fur.
I was making short work of the furballs when suddenly I heard an all mighty crash from the coffin behind us. Imagine my bloody amazement when Otis, the blacksmith, leapt out of his coffin and cleaved the last of the beasts clean in two. The bloody dolt had been pretending to be dead to confuse the temple’s spies in Nulb. What’s more Pearl revealed that she is in fact a high priestess of Saint Cuthbert in disguise called Ydei. Is no one what the bloody say they are anymore?!
With the lycanthropes slain Ydei told us that we could call on her once more in the future if we need her, but not to blow her cover in the process. I must admit I was pleased to find out that she had one over on the men who hunt her, and was not in fact a whore at all. But that Otis gets on my nerves. Who is he to make judgements about my choices? He didn’t even have the blood dignity to apologise for his deception. I don’t give a damn if he was some sort of hero from a past age. It’s me and my crew of men that are the ones getting our hands dirty now! Be damned if I’ll answer to him.
We left the two of them to return to their clandestine villages lives and pushed onward to the temple. We hadn’t got far when a strange looking figure approached us on the road: only the bloody elf Fillian! He revealed that he’d got into some bother and was robbed by agents of the temple of everything but the robes on his back. Bloody elves can never look after themselves. He remembered hearing something about someone or something called Kelamo in charge of some kind of water temple. Interesting, so there must be different sections of the Temple of Elemental Evil.
As we continued our journey we could tell the temple was close because of the fetid stench of the land and an overwhelming sense of ineffable evil. At least for my companions it is ineffable. I have seen its face and have its true image burned into the dark corners of my mind where she waits. Suddenly The Temple of Elemental Evil loomed before us: a monolith of despair it stands within a monstrous looking garden amongst the ruined spires of its former glory. We thought about retreating back, perhaps gather some supplies and courage, but we had come this far and we must wipe this foul stain from the land as soon as possible; Joramy wishes it so!
I am no bloody coward. And, for all their faults, neither are these men I call my companions. And so we approached the dark cathedral that is what remains of the temple. Its main door was chained shut and strange symbols were upon it which radiated magically power. Joe couldn’t even bloody approach them due to some strange warding power. Fillian and Sameson decoded the symbols as some kind of warning of great evil inside. Well no bloody surprise there then!
Joe scouted out the rest of the area and found two side entrances that were also sealed in the same way as the main doors. To the side of one we discovered a window that could be climbed up to and jimmied open. As bloody uncomfortable as this was, this was our entrance to the temple. Inside the décor was just as odorous as outside. The place was covered in debris and clearly was ransacked long ago, perhaps when the temple was first torn down.
Luckily there was no sign of any demonesses waiting to devour our souls so we set about exploring. This floor seemed to be set out in four sections respective of the elements. Amongst the ruins in some side chambers we managed to find a few robes of differing colours, again to represent the different elements. We decided to put these on. I put on a fire robe because if I have to bloody wear one of these horrid garments then it might as well represent the superior element. It was way too big for me though and clearly made for either a man, or a woman with the figure of a man. No one ever makes robes for bigger women these days. I mean even in these evil establishments in which you would think the gender divide would be less prominent in favour of concentrating on pure evil, patriarchy rears its ugly head.
With further exploration we discovered a throne with strange coloured tiles laid out before it end of the temple. Even Ugg saw the logic in the leaving this alone till we worked out what the bloody hell it meant. And so we instead we debated about which of the four staircases we found leading down into the lower levels to take. Finally we headed down and quickly found ourselves lost in a maze of corridors. We ended up going down pretty deep and stumbling into a room where one of the oddest creatures I have ever seen was tied to a pedestal amongst a pile of bones.
The creature looked like someone had crossbred a gigantic owl with a bear, although how the bloody hell that would be accomplished, in defiance of the laws of nature, is anyone’s guess! The thing launched itself at us raking, slashing and biting with claws and beak. Fillian weakened it with a Ray of Enfeeblement spell and Ugg and Sameson stepped forward to meet its attack whilst I bathed it in holy flame! It was no match for us!
Suddenly a troll that had heard the ruckus from another room entered and attacked us yelling something about wanting the fire temple to die. I bloody hate trolls! I remember my home city having problems with the beasts and they just don’t die without a little assistance from fire or acid. The bastard managed to hit me with a spear before we could close ground with it and burn it with my wand. Then it cut down Sameson with its claws. Joe and Fillian pelted it with their arrows whilst Ugg and I hacked it down. Then I covered it in oil and enjoyed watching the creature melt into nothing.
Calling upon the power of the mighty shrew I healed Sameson and together we decided to head back and explore a different passage. Given the trolls reaction to us we decided he must have been part of the water faction of the temple. What’s more it seems the four element sides of the temple are clearly at odds with each other (well fire and water at least) and we can probably use that to our advantage.
Down another tunnel we found a room with a similar pedestal only this time a dragon-like creature was tied to it. The beast had five bloody heads! Perhaps our success with the owlbear and troll made us rash because we decided to bloody antagonize it into attacking us by shooting it with arrows. It obliged by breathing fire down the corridor at us. Of course I am strong against my goddess’ element, but my companions were almost mortally injured so we had no choice but to retreat.
We reasoned that this part of the temple must be the fire part and slightly above our powers to defeat just yet. Therefore, we returned to the upper level to rethink our strategy.  We rested for a short while and argued about whether we should return to Nulb or Hommlet for supplies or not. I insisted we press on but Ugg was dead against it. I bloody gave into the dolt, because it seemed the others agreed with him. Men!!!
In the hall, on the way out, we encountered a group of four Gnolls wearing earth temple robes. We attacked them but half of them fled whilst the other two surrendered. They told us they had been sent from Nulb to enlist at the temple. I wanted to kill the flesh eaters but my companions thought that we would be too harsh. So we let the stinkers go.
Back at Nulb we split up again to stock up on supplies. I was given the job of knocking some bloody silver into our weapons in case we met werewolves again, so off to the smithy I marched. A woman’s work is never done. I spend most the day doing this successfully and I left my prized warhammer to last. Then just as I was swinging the last stroke that bitch ….kardi naera rakma…and it smashed to pieces on the anvil. Now stupid men dwarves get really attached to their weapons and give women’s names to them; because they think women, like weapons, are no more than tools. Now I’m not like those mawkish fools but I couldn’t help but shed a tear to see my poor Smiter ruined so.
Furious with my ill fortune I headed to see that bellicose half-orc smithy to see if I could purchase another one and enlisted Ugg on route. I figured he might warm to another orcoid. Bloody hell was I wrong! We got there and the bloody smithy started yelling at him to get out. And to my amazement a sword flew off the wall into his hands and made him attack Ugg. He’d already taken a chuck out of Ugg before I could respond with a Dispel Magic spell on the sword, which seemed to shut this bizarre magic item off momentarily. I barely managed to get Ugg out of there in time.
I reckon it’s because of Ugg’s bloody stupid lawful nature that was opposed to the chaotic nature of that magically sword. I must remember to go back and try rid the weapon smith of that curse when I get some time. He may be a half breed orc but no one deserves to be a slave to such a curse. For now though I’m forced to go without a study warhammer and use my war-axe instead.
Next we went to the temple of Norebo to pick up Joe, whom it seems luck favours because he won as a load of equipment and healing potions for our travels. Then Sameson and Fillian joined us; Fillian looking especially pleased with himself for some reason. I don’t bloody trust it when elves grin like that! With a full party again we rested before journeying back to the temple for round bloody two.


Day 10 – The Wake

From the diary of Vida Pankhurst

Today I am me and you are she.  To burn within is his decree.
We arrived at Nulb and I separated from my companions to make use of the local smithy whilst they went about their own business. I found it strangely abandoned and so seized this opportunity to practise my craft. Finally having what I needed I turned to leave but was set upon by a mechanical creature that clambered out of the darkness, blocking my exit from the smithy. The construct had the most curious appearance of an arachnid and it fired metallic spikes from its head. Some sort of security golem protecting the smithy.
How fortunate that the thing waited till I had finished my work to attack me!  I turned it to scrap by conjuring a ring of blades about my form and then smashing it to pieces with a dwarven war axe. Leaving it in ruins on the smithy floor I went exploring in the village and learn that the blacksmith had apparently died in our absence from the village. It seems that although we had the doppelganger’s poison slowed by Crippelina, Otis the blacksmith still died from its effects and his wake was to be held the that very day.
Eventually the others in our little group arrived and Sameson, the fool, was drenched from head to foot. It seems he returned to the lake nearby and cleansed it with his magic. Then he was set upon by some type of elemental, which he escaped by plunging into the pool he had just cleansed. At the bottom of the pool he discovered a box and then used a water walking spell to bounce himself to the surface when the elemental had left. He showed us all this box and we opened it to reveal an ancient scroll within.
As Joe read the scroll to the group we shared a vision of a mighty battle. In this battle many mortal mages and warriors battled with creatures pouring forth from the Temple of Elemental Evil.  An evil mage appeared in the battle and used a skull, bearing four coloured gems, to summon the evil demoness Zuggtmoy, the queen of fungi. The mighty forces of the temple were winning until a human warrior came forward and cut Zuggtmoy down with a gigantic sword. Then the evil mage teleported back to the temple, with the skull, where he re-summoned Zuggtmoy. Next our vision cut to a group of powerful magic users sealing Zuggtmoy and the mage within the temple.  
Unsure what to make of this new information imparted from the scroll we decided to go to the blacksmith’s wake and amusingly we all drank bad ale made by Sameson when he had been ill with ghoul fever. Consequently, it drove us into frenzy and, since all the locals drank it too, the wake turned into a ferocious bar brawl. The last thing I remember is pelting that oaf Ugg with bottles before I myself was knocked out by a stray bar stool flung across the room. A small chaos prepared to what will come, but a beginning at least.
We awoke from our frenzies only to be enlisted by the whore Pearl as part of the procession that guarded Otis’ coffin as it was carried away from Nulb. We agreed as we were leaving anyway to find The Temple of Elemental Evil, but first we rested….

Saturday 22 January 2011

Day 9 – The Trap

From the diary of Vida Pankhurst

When darkness falls only fools with eyes of carapace dance within the void…he waits and he watches, forever dreaming, ever dying
Joe turned up this morning complaining about being stuck outside in the rain and no one bloody responded to our note.  So, the four of us continued our investigations within the tavern and questioned those who had abstained from worshipping on God’s Day.
Much to my amusement the dolt Joe decided to play cards with the beautiful rogue Fernoc the Ferd. I noticed she was using tinted cards but credit to her for fleecing these stupid men out of their gold. I winked at her though to let her know I was in on her little secret.
Sameson, during this time, was busy casting Detect Evil by the tavern entrance and four figures that had not been at yesterday’s prayers were revealed as being of an insidious nature. This included the locals known as Zert, Ranos, Doroco and Kobort. Regrouping by the entrance we opted to send Joe upstairs to riffle through their rooms for clues, whilst the rest of us kept a watch on them downstairs.
I was so distracted talking to the charismatic Fernoc, and arranging a little one-on-one time with her, that I didn’t notice Zert about to go upstairs where Joe was searching his rooms. Luckily Sameson convinced that drunkard Elmo to spew on the stairs just in time to block Zert’s path. It was damn close though.
So Joe finally got his sneaky arse back downstairs and told us he had discovered a note in Vert’s room arranging a meeting at the shrine with temple spies that very night. Having few hours to kill I spent some time with the illustrious Fernoc. It’s so nice to finally see a woman excelling within this patriarchal domain. I promised her I would return later. How the bloody hell was in to know I wouldn’t have the chance.
At nightfall we waited in ambush by the shrine. Zert arrived and saw through our efforts to hide, so we had to bloody pretend to be from the temple. He didn’t fall for it though and attacked us. We made short work of him but as Ugg and Joe attempted to dispose of his body they were attacked by an invisible force. Suddenly appearing out of thin air the trader Gromag appeared and attacked Ugg with a rather pernicious looking dagger. Pfft no wonder he bloody ripped me off for my axe earlier.
So I bloody taught him a lesson by smiting him with the deific vengeance of my goddess and he vanished into thin air again and scarped. Realizing that his partner in crime must be no other than Rannos the other trader we headed to the trading post in the hopes of catching both of them. The door was locked so Joe picked it and we were greeted by an angry looking Rannos demanding to know what we were doing there at this time at night. So it seems that the ‘R’ from the first letter had been Rannos, not Rufus after all.
The elemental temple scum realized his number was up and attacked us with his swords just as Grommag appeared behind us. Whilst Ugg went toe-to-toe with Rannos the rest of us teamed up against Grommag. Sameson knocked him down with a Command spell and I summoned my ever faithful spiritual warhammer to knock some sense into him. When Grommag bit the dust Rannos slammed the trading post door and retreated inside.
We pursued the coward but he’d hidden himself somewhere in the darkness. I wanted to burn the whole bloody place down with him in it, but the others stopped me because apparently the other villagers might find that reprehensible. Therefore, I deployed tact again and cast Detect Evil to locate the area he was hiding in. The bastard was in the rafters and jumped down in ambush. He was powerful but no match for our combined might when we surrounded him and hacked him to pieces.
First we nabbed as much treasure as we could from the trading house and then we fetched Hestia, Burne and Rufus to explain what had occurred. Of course they didn’t take our bloody word for it and put us under a Zone of Truth spell. When the truth was revealed they finally got around to actually thanking us - pfft don’t bloody mention it we only risked our bloody lives - and then they had the bloody audacity to “suggest” we leave. Ungrateful wretches! They did let us take most of the treasure we found though, with the notable exception of an amulet which helps it’s wearer avoid detection, and they did stock us up with rations.
Also, that bloody popinjay Sameson is now walking around with some feather in his hair that Jaroo gave him. I don’t think I will ever understand men! What’s more I had no chance to say goodbye to Fernoc. What a bloody mess! Nevermind, onwards to Nulb and from there… The Temple of Elemental Evil.